Next Chapter

untitled, 2005, each = 30″ h x 5″, ceramic
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Lately, I feel as if I’d like to crawl deep into the layers of a form like this.
I am not sure who I am as a woman after so much damn time with MS at the helm in my life.
I am sick of my life being so ‘body centric’ as I move toward health.
Where is the woman in here??????????????
The flirty girl who can feel the heat of a good man.
I almost wish someone could shake me out of it…
The ‘it’ being the almost perpetually neutralized state of survival and ‘fall down / get up,’ and pills and hypervigilance while walking and the work it takes to re-create a life when the other one fades.
I want to feel those fluttery butterflies in my stomach as I appreciate a beautiful man.
I really need a jolt out of this sedentary life.
I just noticed that almost every sentence in this post begins with an I. “I want. I need….”
Perhaps this is a sign I am bored with this particular piece of my healing and the next one needs to include some female-enhancing elements.
Maybe some wooing and carnal pleasure.
IS THE GIRL STILL IN HERE????????????????
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you remain the coolest girl, ageless,
david