Sticking My Neck Out

"Suburban Girl",  2002,  ceramic,  36"x 4"

"Suburban Girl", 2002, ceramic, 36"x 4"

 

I began this blog just one month ago.  I absolutely love the process of revisiting all my artwork from the past and finding one image to complement what I write each day.  The pleasure in this is enough but I was wondering if I was creating in a vacuum as there were so few comments.

Yesterday, a friend looked up the stats on who has visited my site and where you are from.  Turns out that this world-wide-web thing really works!  There have been 245 of you who have viewed pages 645 times this month.  You are from the U.S., Canada, the UK, China Nicaragua, Kuwait, and India.

I am very conscious of wearing existing friendships thin with chronic talk of the gains and losses of living with MS.   I AM SOMETIMES SO BORED WITH MYSELF!  I never envisioned having most of my waking life filled with thoughts of diet, strength, walking, survival, supplements, finding a bathroom fast, and the psychic fortitude it takes to keep to the high road.

I need you all out there.  Very much.   I love people;  find them utterly fascinating, challenging, precious, disappointing, courageous and inspiring.  I used to be so ‘out there’ in the river of it…but now I stay closer to home.  I have marginal energy and my tolerance level for just normal, day-to-day stress is close to zero.  What is a life-lover like me to do?   I muse.   I write.   I do my best to remain visible.  Not just visible but BRIGHT!

My interior landscape is utterly entertaining to me, and now I see that there are those of you out there connected in some way.  My boat has been cast on the sea for a wild ride, captained by just me.  I’m a curious person and happy more than not but sometimes, living in the valley of the waves is a bit much on the girl so I want you to know your presence shows up like a light and it’s enough to have me skip from crest to crest and forget the valley altogether.

Thanks.

XX C.

comments

2 Responses to “Sticking My Neck Out”

  1. Sherri on November 28th, 2010

    I have just found your blog… and your art…and your writing…and your heart. And I’m so glad that I have. I was reading another blog that featured you recently and now here you are…and here I am….

    I wanted you to know that I’m reading… I know what it is to be a bit more isolated, closer to home as you put it…

    I have only just begun my journey with MS… I’m in those beginning days/weeks/months of trying to figure out what it means to me and my life…what I’m going to do with it…. and mourning the loss of what may never be…

    Anyhow, I’m truly enjoying your blog… and your artwork! Beautiful… soulful… thank you!

    Sherri

  2. Jane on March 22nd, 2012

    Again, I thank you. You put the absolutely right words to my feelings (physical and otherwise), and your art is beautiful.

    In some ways MS is like a nightmare – surreal, isolated, sometimes humiliating. As I feel myself diminishing physically, with all the accompanying emotions, I am being forced from moment to moment to surrender, surrender, surrender.

    Please keep writing, I will keep reading.

    Jane

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