New Territory

 

detail of installation,  1991, ceramic, coal, earth, 10' x 10'

detail of installation, 1991, ceramic, coal, earth, 10' x 10'

 

A friend said yesterday that my posts sounded different since my return from the MAYO Clinic.

I hadn’t noticed but she is right.   I have new and soberingly solid information about the state of my physical self.

I am sick.

Funny..  don’t think I’ve ever used that phrase to describe myself till now.

I just can NOT tolerate people who wear an illness like a new jacket for all to comment on.   It is just TOO MUCH THEATER that surrounds this kind of human frailty.  People make entire constructed personalities out of body functions gone awry.

Boring,  boring,  boring.

And yet..  here am I.

Enough energy to go out and water the trees but then I am spent.

Where is my thread to life-force?

And what does this mean for the capable me;   the me who works,  adventures,  has friends,  gives dinner parties,  wears shoes with laces?

I am unveiled and at the altar of a damned adventure I didn’t ask for.

Today I want to run.

And leave the groom bereft of whatever it is he wanted..

I ain’t got no JUICE for anyone but myself and this destination that doesn’t show up on my GPS.

Very surely new territory……

comments

Leave a Reply