She Walks Pretty

"CALLIGRAPHIC STRUT",  40" x 30",  1995, m/m

"CALLIGRAPHIC STRUT", 40" x 30", 1995, m/m

Yesterday I went to a place called Hangar Orthotics and Prosthetics.

They make legs and arms etc.

Also, they create braces for people like me with foot drop which happens sometimes to people with MS.

It is a failure of the nerve impulses to travel coherently all the way down to lower extremities.

As a result , I have trouble lifting my right foot up as I walk and to avoid catching my dangling toes on the ground, I swing my whole leg out to the side to avoid the ground altogether.

It makes me tired to do this and afraid too.. afraid of taking a fall I might not have the strength to recover from.

And SO… along comes as my hero!  ALBERT.

He fit me with a 1/8″ thick resin brace that goes from my toes up to my knee joint.

He made an insta-cast of my entire foot and calf to be able to custom fit this to me.

It sounds disgustingly techno and heavy but in reality is fairly unobtrusive.

It keeps my foot at a 90 degree angle at all times and insures that my foot no longer curls under itself which it liked to do.

When he  let me try a brace on to get the feel of what this could do, my entire being relaxed into the effortlessness of WALKING! It was THRILLING! This walking thing…

The level of trustable support is amazing and I felt like a stupid idiot for not doing it sooner!

It was that pesky pride issue. I really had this very grand story going on about how it would look and be bulky and call MORE attention to myself and, and, and…

I got to pick out a pattern from a fairly extensive catalog to personalize this new part of my life.

I picked a leopard print.

This brace cannot really be detected too easily under pants; even the stretchy and form fitting
ones I wear.

I’ll need slightly bigger shoes to allow for the 1/8″ of resin but really no big deal in the scheme of things.

I am happy.

Happy I got around to taking good care of myself.

Happy I put the pesky pride down.

Pleased to think about using the energy I’ve been targeting toward fear and hyper-vigilance in my negotiating the world, for something else entirely.

Ease… give me ease.. I want ease now..

Makes me think that there is a slight possibility I may get some more of it when my power wheelchair is here.

Oh, God.. I’ll think about that tomorrow…

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