Detritus

DETRITUS:
Loose matter resulting from the wearing away or disintegration of a tissue or substance.
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Each time I make changes in my life or transform, I forget about what lies in waste in my shadow as I walk away..

I have changed so often that the process of flux is the air I breathe.

And I continue to marvel at the courage and gumption I manage to call forth to keep moving forward.

But, alas… I do not seem to remember that for each movement toward wholeness one needs to at least pick up the broom and look down and back as we sweep away the remains of what was and step into our new shoes.

For a law of change seems to be that to pass GO we must tend to each and EVERY pesky little particle related to the past we are divesting ourselves of.

Because those little left behind and forgotten dustbunnies will roll out to get ya unless we give them their due.

Projects, relationships, past ways of being which no longer serve must be looked once more in the eye and gently (or not) shown the door.

The only time I really worry that I am being a ‘BITCH’ is this process of standing up for myself on the other side of change.

My voice changes.

No more ‘making nice.’

Darwinism at it’s best as the survival of the fittest shows it’s colors.

I WILL be whole.

And occasionally it looks less than nice.

I have no apologies.

Because cleaning up after a job well done is usually messy at best.

And I left my starched and white pinafores at the gate a long, long time ago.

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2 Responses to “Detritus”

  1. Mark on September 28th, 2010

    Excellent job of taking out the trash. You are truly an inspiring writer and person.

  2. Laura Hegfield on September 29th, 2010

    As always Cathy you have offered honesty, courage and wisdom in you words to us. Thank you for being you.

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