The Man Box

textile design, 1987

My sense is that men are having a tough time of it lately..

We, as women, are in the throes of redefining ourselves.

The pendulum may have swung to a less radical and more integrated display:

ie.. we are not burning our bras anymore.

But, really.. we’re still figuring ourselves out as far as what THE RIGHT TO BE looks like for us.

And so it makes sense the confusion men feel regarding how we want to be interacted with.

The template hasn’t quite stopped reeling enough for all of us to get the outline drawn in the sand.

When I saw this short video of a big black guy; Tony Porter, talking about THE MAN BOX,

I couldn’t help but listen.

My pre-conceived (prejudiced) notions of seeing a guy like that, looking sort of ‘thug-like’ dressed in a fine suit and holding a microphone speaking to a full house of thousands of women,

Was more than I could ignore.

His honesty, apology and vulnerability moved me.

They also made me ache for all of us committed to evolution.

It’s such a chore.

And takes so long.

I feel blessed indeed, when I am in the presence of anyone who has done their work, effected change in themselves and fought the fight of unlocking the heavy chains of family and cultural status quo.

I am so moved , sometimes, in the witnessing of that kind of courage and tenacity in myself and others that I drop to my knees,

And say thank you to the Something-larger-than-me for what it took for us to make that leap across the chasm.


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