Disappointment

It disappoints me when I am sharing a meal with someone at a restaurant

And my dining companion neglects to treat our server with respect.

The absence of ‘please’ and ‘thank-you’

Before or after a request

Literally makes my heart sting.

“I want the steak.”

or:

“May I please have the steak?”

One is a demand with no recognition of shared humanity.

The other: a relationship.

When I am disappointed in this way I leave the situation with the intention to beef up my own civility skills.

Disappointment has served it’s purpose for me.

I experienced it and felt the hollowness and then moved on in my day prepped with the mission to connect deeper myself.

I had a craving for carbohydrates recently.

I ate a gluten-free muffin.

Later that afternoon I could not walk.

I am fully aware that ANY kind of sugar has this effect on me

But I WANTED THAT MUFFIN!

There I was.. reduced in muscle strength, life energy and possibility.

I sat there.

And sat there some more,

Waiting for the effects of the thing to move through my body and reclaim my recognizable energy level.

I disappointed myself.

I caved.

The next day I got up and made sure my diet was sans-sugar and anything else I know will curtail my life force.

I re-doubled my efforts in the clean eating department

And felt actual gratitude for the disappointment I encountered the previous day

Because I re-entered life

With a deeper commitment to live it well.

comments

One Response to “Disappointment”

  1. Jane on April 12th, 2012

    it’s soooooo hard to be perfect…

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