Groking the Grail

detail of painting on wool flannel

A good girlfriend of mine has 2500 Facebook friends.

She uses Facebook well to market her work.

I asked her the other day how to stop getting posts from certain people who send me things like what they are eating and how scared they are of winter approaching.

She replied: “I don’t know how to de-friend someone. Click on to where it says ‘FRIENDS’ and see what they say.”

I had a visceral reaction to the word ‘de-friend’ which shocked me.

Was I bad to de-friend someone? Many people? All of them? (as in de-activating my entire account).

How had this new shame-based decision made it’s way into my fairly intelligent mind?

And how do I get it out?

I was reading recently about new technology being developed involving a photo being taken from the lid of a trashcan from which an alarm would sound every time a recyclable piece of trash was ‘mistakenly’ tossed away.

You can bet your booty you’d get that Starbuck’s cup sleeve out of the can in a hurry.

Where shame is concerned there’s nothing like it to beat the motivation possibilities for the human race.

And so.. I did de-activate my Facebook account.

I did it to save myself.

My personal litmus test for ANY relationship is this: IS THIS MUTUALLY BENEFICIAL?

Am I getting as much or more out of the dynamic as I give?

My grail is Peace with a capitol “P.”

Everyone has their own idea of ‘grailness’ but this is mine.

My blog provides me with plenty of ability to be visible, connect and create.

What IS enough?





One Response to “Groking the Grail”

  1. Carole Zoom on October 24th, 2013

    Good for you
    I am probably one of the friends who sent you a breakfast photo or political post. But if it’s important I’m also one of the few who will reach out by phone or email.
    Seek Peace

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