Claustrophobia

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“CATHY’S HANDS” photo credit- Gay Block
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Inside an MRI machine can be a decidedly alien experience; laid on a gurney and mechanically rolled into a tight tube.. weird light and the incessant pounding (LOUD!!!!!!) of the magnetic resonance with the admonition to keep ABsolutely still for too many minutes at a time.

Disembodied voices in their safe place tell tales of “This one will be 7 minutes. Keep still.”

I close my eyes.

I have refused music.

I am not claustrophobic which gives me the chance to be curious; can I feel the magnets? can i follow their path? can i make even this a meditation? why not?

I become my own witness; absorbed in the science and wonder of my experience.

The 2 hr. session ends.

I feel weirdly sad.

How odd.

And wonderful.

This recognition I will take out into life.

See if I can stay this curious.

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5 Responses to “Claustrophobia”

  1. Rita Kindl Myers on October 10th, 2014

    Me Too! Me Too! This how I cope with MRI exams, which I dislike immensely. Might as well occupy or amuse myself, while I lay there…
    Nice description, Thanks!

  2. Debra Moody on October 10th, 2014

    …and I can’t help but love seeing little Livvy’s wee muzzle sniffing or licking your left hand. Love.

  3. Barry on October 11th, 2014

    I always get into the patterns of the noises, allowing them to become somewhat hypnotic. Constantly in the back of my mind is a wondering if my bladder control will last long enough. And one time I forgot to remove my wallet from my back pocket ….. all cards with a magnetic strip were erased.

  4. Alexandra Eldridge on October 11th, 2014

    Is this recent? As always, making something fascinating out of something not necessarily so. xx

  5. laura Hegfield on October 24th, 2014

    I too often meditate when in an MRI. I practice metta for at the people who take such good care of me, for all the people who taught them how to do the work, how to be kind and compassionate. I offer metta to my broken/healing/broken/healing whole holy self.

    Sometimes I listen to the clicking, banging, otherworldly sounds and I hear words in the rhythms.. and sometimes I try to notice if I can feel the pull of the magnets. This is hardest. Every once in a while though there is a slight sense of something… I imagine the moon pulling earths waters this way and that, also with mysterious rhythmic precision.

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