Learning Resilience



Forgive my frequent postings but things are moving quickly through me and letting them steep feels rough. Take what’s good and leave the rest. I so appreciate your precious time.

My attention goes toward what skills we each need to stay ok in our too fast, overwhelming, annoying, speedy, painful and complex world.

I turn on the TV and come close to gagging literally.

Suffering, frailty, madness, terror, all the shadows of our own humanity multiplied many-fold.

I deal with all these things to varying degrees in my physical body.

You, I am sure do too.

Because I make no distinction in ‘hierarchy of pain’ (often people preface a complaint to me by saying their suffering doesn’t compare to mine);

For our purposes here pain is pain, suffering is suffering.

What can we do?

Sometimes, like in the moments of the twin towers of 9-11, the magnitude frays all our circuits and we shut down. Stop. Stop. Stop.

Life is too much and who we were is gone and who we will become is not yet.

This, on one end of the spectrum but I write about the in-between places:

My body frequently hosts an evolutionary tension; example: I can not wrangle the strength to lift my torso up to sitting to transfer to my chair from bed one day.

What do I do? This has never happened before.

I lie there at a 90′ angle for 15 minutes while I moan, cry, stop crying, think, get very quiet, realize I alone can not move forward and am stuck, remember there are people who I love and are nearby to call for help.

I get quieter still and call not one but two friends. (evolution for Cath! Ask for help!).

Excruciatingly humbled in my frailty I let myself be lifted; un-showered, unbrushed hair.

I haven’t the will to fight the support nor the energy to worry about my presentation.

But I did reach out.

I evolved in that experience.

I gave up my egoist reactions-by-rote and became more related to the world. I got very undefended. Super soft.

This, I think is the skill we must each foster in order not to become totally disconnected from our beloved world who is moving through Her own crises, humiliations and destructions of old systems. It’ part of the plan..for us..for Her. She is making corrections. We must as well.

We can either stay comfortable in blame and judgement or try our best to remain related to each other.

We must push through, refine ourselves, and keep trying to find out how our own personal experiences relate to our relationship with the complexities of the world.

This is my experience of how to stay related; to ourselves and each other.

Try new stuff..new reactions to old problems, pains, pleasures.

Fall on your face and get up and do it again.

Keep what’s right and leave he est.

See how light it feel to lay down your armor.

Someone else will pick it up to be sure.

Pity the extra weight they choose.


2 Responses to “Learning Resilience”

  1. Adele on August 7th, 2016

    thank you thank you thank you

  2. ellen fox on August 7th, 2016

    I so relate to this. Kathy, you might enjoy browsig Roshi Joan Sutherland’s Dharma Works – talks, articles, etc.


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