One of my good girlfriends had a very big birthday recently and was feeling trepidatious about the magnitude of the number.

The three of us (above) got together for a celebratory breakfast on an elegant Santa Fe outdoor patio on a perfect fall day.

There were rose petals strewn on the table, stargazer lilies pinking up the table, vintage half-masks to silly things up.

We toasted one another in a chosen family sort of way with a mimosa and pretty much sat there and marinated in the blessing of close friendship all morning.

Many years ago I belonged to a women’s support group in which we did an exercise I never forgot.

Each woman took her turn siting in the center of the circle as each of us wrote on separate small pieces of paper who this woman was for us.

I still have my words today and they remain so important to me when I forget who I am.

The words weren’t all of the stellar variety but honest all the same in how I was experienced by these women; elegant, intelligent, fashionable, trouble with men, poor self image, shy, empathic, complicated, creative, expressive, strong, survivor, pretty were just some of the words for me 30 years ago.

This exercise was done anonymously which was important.

We did this very thing for our birthday friend which seemed to move her a great deal. I think the act of witnessing one another authentically is a gift we all long for as so often we carry inaccurate impressions of who we actually are and how we are experienced by others.

A powerful part of this exercise is that the receiver must read aloud all the words she/he is given before taking them home.

I sat at that birthday table utterly full of gratitude that I have attracted such stellar women into my life and I had the chance to tell them so.


2 Responses to “GIRLS”

  1. alexis mcnaughton on September 25th, 2016

    What a beautiful description of such a memorable day. Words, words, words. We don’t hear them enough or write them enough. Thank you Cathy. xx

  2. Jenny on September 25th, 2016

    It is so good to tell people how much they mean before it is too late. And so good to have much fun . Hope Em went too.

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