In The Middle

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The good part of the “bad” in chronic illness is the fact our old and cherished identity we thought we’d get to preen and feed forever
melts into a puddle. We are left with a rippling and fractured reflection of our old self. There’s no one to assist in the warrior’s path of bringing the new “us” into focus.

We are ‘in the middle’ as a new way of life.

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Pema Chodron says:

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“We are told about the pain of chasing after pleasure and the futility of running from pain. We hear also about the joy of awakening, of realizing our interconnectedness, of trusting the openness of our hearts and minds. But we aren’t told all that much about this state of being in-between, no longer able to get our old comfort from the outside but not yet dwelling in a continual sense of equanimity and warmth.
Anxiety, heartbreak, and tenderness mark the in-between state. It’s the kind of place we usually want to avoid. The challenge is to stay in the middle rather than buy into struggle and complaint. The challenge is to let it soften us rather than make us more rigid and afraid. Becoming intimate with the queasy feeling of being in the middle of nowhere only makes our hearts more tender. When we are brave enough to stay in the middle, compassion arises spontaneously. By not knowing, not hoping to know, and not acting like we know what’s happening, we begin to access our inner strength.
Yet, it seems reasonable to want some kind of relief. If we can make the situation right or wrong, if we can pin it down in any way, then we are on familiar ground. But something has shaken up our habitual patterns and frequently they no longer work. Staying with volatile energy gradually becomes more comfortable than acting out or repressing it. This open-ended tender place is called bodhichitta. Staying with it is what heals. It allows us to let go of our self-importance. It’s how the warrior learns to love”.

comments

3 Responses to “In The Middle”

  1. Basha on January 28th, 2019

    Oh yes. God, how I love to pin things down. And I’m soooo quesy!
    Thanks Cath. XXXXOOOO

  2. Pamela on January 28th, 2019

    Thank you, Cathy.

    Such a perfect reading for today.

    xoxo

  3. gerry harty on January 30th, 2019

    Yes that’s me!Thank you so much for this Cathy!xoxoxo

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